November 22nd 2014
That’s Life©1966 #542 (11-21-14)*

Posted under That's Life Columns

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One week after my birthday, tomorrow Nov. 22, 1963 JFK was shot…do you remember it or where you were when it happened?

Fat Lady Doing The Scales


            A lot of people want to know about the election results and if the numbers have changed… they did a little. The spread between me and third place stays the same so it looks like the fat lady may sing before long (Remember Yogi Bera’s “It ain’t over till the fat lady sings”… referring to his opinion of opera and the real end of things). Mike Ceremello called and said he was conceding the election and had a two word concession speech…”Bite me”. He also said Ourania Riddle told him there were hundreds of mail-in ballots at the post office that were taken directly to the polling places on election eve… hum…suppose the P.O. and the county are in cahoots to keep Mike from getting elected… I told him to call Ose/Bera for advice.

The county expects to maybe have ALL of the final results, maybe, by today… or so. All of those who crunch numbers and know a lot more about elections than I do say it is a done deal… there are not enough votes left to be counted to make any major changes with six players involved… So I may indeed, once again, become one of your city fathers… Does that make my first wife Linda a city mother?

If so children, your city father would say, remember I can’t promise any miracles I’d be only one vote in five but the other four, especially the three with two years to go on their terms may well listen to some of the things I have to say. I’m not Mike Ceremello and Mike is not me. I fight to win wars, not battles, and we have some very important pressing issues facing our city.


I Didn’t Agree To This Carp



Anybody ask you about any of the following? They didn’t me:

  1. How did “illegal aliens” become “undocumented residents”? How does an illegal alien get back into the U.S. several times and end up killing two Northern California sheriff’s deputies. Of the 11 million or so now living here how many are criminals in their home country. How many have a variety of diseases like TB or Aids? How many are child molesters or rapists? No one knows and no one is asking are they? WTF?
  2. How and when did bums, who just don’t want to work, become homeless individuals we have to feed, clothe, buy booze get free drugs and find housing for?
  3. Who told your governor we wanted to build twin water funnels to help keep the toilets and swimming pools down south filed with delta water? Does he care it will drain the delta and kill most ranching and farming plus wildlife… Who asked for this? Not me. Maybe the mega bucks from L.A.?
  4. Who said it was ok to transport 80,000 barrels of toxic, high flammable crude oil through Dixon 24/7… at way to high of a rate of speed? Sure as hell not me. We need over passes now before a projected earthquake hits and half of our citizens become French fries when one of these rolling time bombs flops over and explodes.
  5. Who said it was OK to take all of San Francisco’s hospital waste and dump in just downwind of us in our landfill… when the south wind blows just don’t breathe the airborne pathogens and you’ll probably ok.
  6. Why do to you have to have I.D. to drive a car, cash a check or use a credit card but not to vote. There are some idiots out there championing to let the 11,000,000 undocumented Democrats vote without showing any ID… Great idea huh? Starting shortly “undocumented residents” can get a Ca. driver’s license which they can use as I.D. DMV is putting on extra 1,000 workers to help (with us footing the bill of course) the illegal aliens get a legal driver’s license…Who besides the state assembly said that was OK?
  7. Who approved illegal aliens getting California driver’s licenses? Or a college education or free everything we have to pay for: Health, dental, food, housing, education… etc. Who is it that makes these changes without asking us?
  8. How about the brilliant minds that built the high school with only one way in and out? In the event of a disaster can you image the mess and danger of hundreds of folks/vehicles trying to get in and out? There’s a back road to Pedrick that needs to be explored.
  9. I have no problem with undocumented folks getting documents and becoming citizens through the front door as millions of Americans have done… as a matter of fact I encourage and support it. I am not in favor of “amnesty” of 11,000,000 or so criminals i.e., illegal aliens, now called undocumented residents, getting a mass pardon and automatically becoming “citizens”. Are you? Can they read, write, are they sick, child molesters, rapists, killers? Can they support themselves and their families, are they escaping criminals charges in their own country… Countries are dumping their undesirables on us with your president’s blessing. He has even ordered local law enforcement to take a “hands off” approach to illegal aliens…WTF? … Look at Detroit, thanks Obama.
  10. Who said this was OK? I mean seriously WTF?

I think we need to close our borders before the Ebola crowd descends upon us for treatment and just refuses to obey our wishes like the dumb broad back east who said she wouldn’t be confined for the incubation period because she knew more than the doctors…and just went out in the public…she could have been the new typhoid Mary and what would she have said…”I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to kill so many people”. Who said this was OK? Not me for sure.

The liberals need to toughen up and the conservatives need to lighten up and remember this is the USA and it should always be American first…

  1. Who said it was OK to spend BILLIONS in the sand overseas on zillions of zealots who don’t like us, don’t trust us and want us to be like them? Pull our troops out and let them kill each other…they have for centuries and will again if and when we ever leave. They promise death to all of us infidels… I’m all in favor of turning the whole region back to sand and let them start over again… Or let the military take control and finally give us a chance to win a war instead of having a “neighborhood organizer” call the shots.

The point of this rant is Americans feel helpless… the majority didn’t even vote in this past election… Nobody asks us anything. The government just takes and takes and some yahoo makes these stupid decisions and we are helpless to do anything about it… except pay for it. Change is coming, it has to. The system is broken, the powers to be work for themselves and not those who elected them. We have become a nation of weenies lead by a man in which even his own party and country has no faith.



More Things For Thought

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When my grandkids finally figure out the Jamaicans, the Irish and wizards don’t all have the same accents I’m probably going to get fired from story time.

A customer almost died in front of me today… but then I made myself slowly count to 10 and put the scissors back in the drawer.

Look, if I offer you a bite of my calamari you are bound by ethics to offer me some of your food… legally it’s called “squid pro quo”.

I’d like to offer a big shout out to the waitress who checked my ID the other night, and then ruined the quaint charm of the moment by saying, “wow. Your… your like older than my dad!”

The cop took a long look around the potato splattered room and then said “I’ve never seen anything like it”… he then took a long drag on his cigarette and added, ‘it was a mashacrre”.

People ask me what I’m really into these says… I answer “debt”.

Biology: The science of writing awesome bios.

Customers never cease to amaze me.  Today some guy came in and said “I want to return this gum… it tastes awful”… I said, “Sir, that’s not gum, its Band-Aids.”…. “Oh, well, I want to return these Band-Aids.  Some fools been eating them”.

I did a somersault for the first time in years today… I know that’s not really something to write about but I’m getting bored laying here waiting for the paramedics.

Had trouble sleeping this morning… they added a trumpet to the band in the early church service.

Ya know, duct tape can fix almost anything but it can’t fix stupidity… but it can muffle it.

When the kids were little and a solicitor would call we used to hand one of them the phone and say “It’s Barney for you.”

I’m an ok dancer until I whip out my finger guns… then I’m just majestic.

I spotted a spider in the bedroom so I did what any red-blooded American man would do… I started an argument with the wife so I could sleep on the couch.

Give a woman an inch… and she probably won’t call you again.

 I’m old enough to remember being the TV remote.

I’m really happy with it being shorter and the ladies seem to like it that way too… what I say to my barber.

Oh, ok… I was actually planning on letting the bed bugs bite… but good call.

My neighbor finally confronted me about clothing missing from his clothes line… I nearly filled his pants.

I lost my balance on an escalator… fell down the stairs for two hours.

A lady friend asked me what I look for in a relationship… “A way out” was apparently the wrong answer.

When they say all expenses paid… does that include bail?

I just watched a fifteen-year old girl who was busy texting walk head long into a lamp post… I’m no longer an atheist.

We were at the beach and a guy out in the water was yelling “Help! Shark!”… we all just laughed.  We knew that shark wasn’t going to help.

 Like most parents my wife and I love to watch our beautiful son while he sleeps… freaks his wife out, though.

In China the labels on stuff reads “Made by someone you know”.

I spent about 10 minutes watching someone try and parallel park… I didn’t actually see the person so I’m not going to assume what gender she was.

I just opened the freezer door and the vodka bottle just kind of rolled out into my hands… no way am I going to ignore this sign from God.

I told my kids and grandkids they could no longer call me dad or gramps but only by my professional titles… connoisseur of lukewarm, half-eaten food, broken toy engineer, and butt-wipeologist.

Word of the day….Obama:  I opened a bottle of scotch and drank it Obama self.



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November 16th 2014
That’s Life©1966 #541 (11-14-14)*

Posted under That's Life Columns

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Déjà vu all over again”…This isn’t my first race so I know “It ain’t over till it’s over”… Déjà vu, (i/ˌdʒɑː ˈv/) from French, literally “already seen”, is the phenomenon of having the strong sensation that an event or experience currently being experienced has been experienced in the past, whether it has actually happened or not.


Just Quoting My Favorite Speech Guy

2014yogi1 2014 yogi

            Everywhere we go people keep congratulating me/us on winning the city council election. The kind of final results are expected by today, Friday, from Solano County… but then they really can’t say for sure. They have until Dec. 2 to present the final counts to the board of supervisors so who knows?  Maybe the results will be available by the next election.

Scott Pederson pulled away a little and took over first place after the initial results were made public. I was 70 some votes behind him and Mike Ceremello was like 70 some votes behind me. As of late Scott was like 150 ahead of me and Mike was like 50 some behind me… So, like my best word speaking hero Yogi Bera would say: “It ain’t over till the fat lady sings.” She apparently is still warming up… so I’ve been telling people Yogi’s truism, “It ain’t over till it’s over” and it ain’t over until its official which we think it might be… sometime for sure.

Here’s some more of Yogi’s (New York Yankees/Mets baseball manager, Hall of Famer and former pro catcher) acclaimed statements: “The future ain’t what it used to be…I never said most of the things I said…you should go to other people’s funerals otherwise they won’t come to yours…you would have won if we hadn’t beaten you (Mike?) …he hits from both sides of the plate he’s amphibious…it gets late early out there…nobody goes there anymore it’s too crowded…you can observe a lot by just watching…if you come to a fork in the road just take it…if you don’t know where you’re going you might end up someplace else…baseball is ninety per cent mental and other half is physical…I’m not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia, let the walk to school like I did”. Yogi was a very successful player and manager in spite of not quite having the same linguistic abilities as KoKo the signing gorilla. But, he gave the world some beauties to talk about like… “You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six”…

City hall folks are just as up in the air as the rest of us. According to sources who know about such stuff, mathematically the results shouldn’t change much based on voting trends… I just asked people to hold their congrats until its official because, as we all know, strange things can happen…

Take Yogi’s cousin Ami Bera who’s running for congress against Doug Ose. Election night he was 3,000 votes behind. The last time I heard he was about 500 (or by now probably even ahead) votes behind with about 30,000 votes of different kinds still to be counted. A similar thing happened the last time he ran and was behind at first only to win when the later votes came in… once again proving Yogi’s wisdom.

In our case it’s only about 700 votes that were still out split between Vacaville and Dixon… don’t ask me how these two gobs of votes got stuck together.  As a matter of fact I don’t even know how the county voter’s registrar’s office functions… and how, with only one job to do, they can screw it up so badly.


More Things For Thought

2014 Smikley - Copy

*I’m really quite disappointed by the vote in Scotland… I’m pretty sure it was our only chance to see Shrek on a flag.

*Tarantulas really make a pretty good pet… and when they die rather than grieving you’ll feel an almost overwhelming sense of relief.

*My neighbor told me he had a really great wife… but then her husband came and took her home.

*People tend to overlook Dracula’s positive attributes… such as when he’s in his bat form he eats mosquitoes and other unwanted backyard insects.

*I just realized that no matter what it says on my tombstone… I’m gonna have to read it upside down.

*I finally found a simple and easy way to deal with my weight problem… I threw my scale out.

*Ebola has been in this country for maybe a week and people are panicking and wearing masks… AIDS has been here for years and people still won’t wear a protection.

*She asked me for time and distance… I guess she wants to calculate velocity.

*I’m not saying delivering a baby is easy… but I’m pretty sure all I need is a box, some tape and some stamps.

*They say that exercising 15 minutes a day adds 3 years to our lifespan… the real bitch being it adds it to your eighties, not your twenties.

*Why would anyone want a baby? It’s just another thing you have to clean.

*The body is 70% water… so I’m not really fat, I’m flooded.

*One of the boys asked me where babies come from… I said “pal, go ask your mom.  I’m still having trouble with why Garfield talks and Odie doesn’t”.

*May you never be as bored as whoever figured out that holding a seashell to your ear sounds like the ocean.

*It seems kind of intimidating and formal to call it a “paternity test”… let’s just call it a “pop quiz”.

*I had nothing to do tonight so I was just eating Doritos and watching Judge Judy in my underwear… WTF?  How did Judge Judy get in my house and why is she wearing my skivvies?

*”Well, that can’t be right!”… What dogs must think when they see us catching a ball with our hands.

*”At the same time” requires more keystrokes than “simultaneously”… the point being having a good vocabulary helps you type gooder.

*Immortality sounded great when I was in my thirties… but now in my sixties it just sounds exhausting.

*I don’t understand all these Chinese restaurants that post signs in the window “NO MSG!”… Who would want to eat at a restaurant that doesn’t allow texting?

*A few years ago I met my wife, the love of my life and the mother of my children… it was awkward at first but they all seem to get along now.

*Aquafina is Spanish for “tap water in a plastic bottle”.

*I once dated a girl who thought windmills were solar powered.

*I remember staying in a motel that was so seedy the Gideon Bible in the nightstand only had seven commandments.

*That clown that ran thru the White House could go to prison for 10 years… just one more reason I don’t run.

*In the interests of workplace safety my store has put up signs all over that say “CAUTION: OPEN DOORS SLOWLY”… my best time so far is seven minutes.

*Five years ago today I asked a beautiful girl out on a date.  Today at 3pm I asked the same girl to marry me… she said “no” both times.

*I’m pretty sure all of the 7 dwarfs were named after a stage of Snow White’s heroin addiction.

*Our local mortician admitted he always ties the shoelaces of the deceased together… if the zombie apocalypse ever happens it’s going to be hilarious.

*If people would moan loudly during the TSA security pat-downs the line would probably move much faster.


Just Got Re-Certified

2014 ref badge 1

There are some big changes coming in the world of soccer refereeing… I just attended a re-certification clinic Monday night in Sacramento for USSF Instructors from all over Northern California. The stud duck over instructors’ lives right here in Dixon…Alberto Marin. Alberto is a National emeritus referee, a state instructor and assessor. There were instructors in the class from as far away as Alturas.  So what about it?

New entry referee clinics to be taught will have to enroll and take part of the on line. They will need to do a lot of reading, take mini-quizzes and pass a 50 question test.  Then they can attend a 12 hour course (8 hours classroom and four hour in the field, down from 16) to complete their training and receive their certification if they pass. Those 19 who just became ref’s in the recent Dixon class I taught are the last bunch to be trained that way. It is the way of the future and the internet will play a big part, from registration to advanced training and updates on rules and regulations… What if you don’t have a computer? Better find one or don’t plan on becoming a soccer referee.




A man received the following text message from his neighbor: I am so sorry mate. I’ve been riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been helping myself to your wife, day and night when you’re not around, in fact more than you.  I do not get it at home, but that’s no excuse. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apology with my promise that it won’t, ever happen again.

The man, anguished and betrayed, went into his bedroom, grabbed his gun and without a word, shot his wife and killed her. A few moments later, a second text message came in: Bloody auto spell!  I meant “Wifi”, not “wife” sorry.



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November 1st 2014
That’s Life©1966 #539 (10-31-14)*

Posted under That's Life Columns

Ted Hickman Feel Free to

How about them Giants!




With Halloween today and Election Day coming at least these beggars are wearing masks. Don’t even send me the tasteless wisecracks about not believing that Muslims celebrated Halloween… I won’t use them.



Election Day coming this Tuesday…


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 The trio pictured above: Bassinette, Bogue and Pederson want to bring you four more years of what we’ve just had. If you like the stupid $7 million taxpayer hole downtown,(and they want to build another) your sewage rate doubled and your water rate tripled, and more low income housing, then by all means vote for these guys. They’ve all taken money from those who have special interests. They’ve complained they haven’t been getting their share of publicity in this paper… So here you go, right in the best read part of the paper. Happy now? I’m giving up some of my valuable column space to help you out. Now complain about this. I offered this space to you three to disprove anything written that was untrue and not a peep…a lot of whining but nada on the fact side.

The biggest problem is that many voters don’t know what they don’t know.



1500 people signed petitions saying “Let us Vote” remember… Now’s your chance! Don’t forget to vote Tuesday or mail in your ballots!

This is the last bit on the election (I know, thank goodness, enough is enough right?) so we need to concentrate on important things like how to keep the kids dry on Halloween. Of all of the nights of the year during the drought why did the wicked witches conjure up rain on beggar’s night? How cruel…

Sounds like something MAC and Mac D. might do.  I can see them now standing around their cauldrons stirring their special brew wearing their high black pointed hats. They are trying to come up with a potion that will make people vote the way they want them to. They tried filling the air with their poisonous rantings now they may be trying something new…A liquid to slip in drinks at the local watering holes.

Wait till they find out about the surprise their arch enemy Mike Ceremello has planned for the last days before the election. Even this big money political group known as DPAC, the “Dixon Political Action Committee” (Really stands for “Dumb People Always Comply”) will be surprised by this.


Missing Wife



A husband went to the Dixon Police station to report his missing wife: Husband : I’ve lost my wife, she went shopping yesterday and has still not come home.
Sergeant : What is her height  Husband : Oh, 5 something . . .
Sergeant :  Build?Husband : Not slim, not really fat.
Sergeant : Color of eyes? Husband : Never noticed.
Sergeant : Color of hair? Husband : Changes according to season.
Sergeant : What was she wearing? Husband : Dress/suit/blue jeans -I don’t remember exactly.
Sergeant : Did she go in a car? Husband : yes.
Sergeant : What kind of car was it? Husband :  2015 Corvette Stingray 3LT with the Z51 Performance Package, shark gray metallic paint, with the 6.2 litre V8 engine with Direct Injection generating 460 HP.  8-speed paddle-shift automatic

transmission, and GT bucket seats, and has a very thin scratch on the front left door…  at this point the husband started crying…
Sergeant : Don’t worry sir… We’ll find your car.


What, No Stork?

yyyyyfrog moving

Six year old Annie returns home from her Dixon school and says that today she had her first family planning lesson at school. Her mother, very interested, asks: “Oh… How did it go?”
“I nearly died of shame!” she answers. “Sam from down the street says the stork brings babies. Sally next door said you can buy babies at the orphanage. Pete in my class says you can buy babies at the hospital.” Her mother answers laughingly, “But that’s no reason to be ashamed.”
“No… but I can’t tell them that we were so poor that you and daddy had to make me yourselves!”


More Things For Thought!


We were out hunting in the foothills and Smokey the Bear approached us wearing that silly hat and smoking a huge cigar… he took a puff then pitched it into the dry brush and said “no one will ever believe you.” Shoulda shot him.

The wind blew a smart car into my lane… I had to roll down my window and swat it out of the way.

I’m not against half-naked women waitressing in bars… at least not as often as I’d like to be.

A police officer pulled me over and asked if I knew what the speed limit was… heck, I’m not getting paid to tell him his job!

I had a few too many beers at a Dixon art exhibition and threw up all over the wall… someone offered me three grand for it.

I’ve decided to do something about my weight… lie.

65% of swimmers say they pee in the ocean… now we know why SpongeBob is yellow.

I could understand Eve’s choice to doom all of humanity over nachos… but an apple?

My dad told me fire engines are painted red for camouflage… so they can sneak up on fires without being noticed.

If cartoons are a reliable guide, the secret to never aging is to wear the same clothes every day.

Just remember, if your entire outfit can be purchased at a gas station… it’s not appropriate for court.

Saw a guy I know to be a police officer today dressed as an airline pilot… must be a “plane clothes cop”.

At work I always greet people with “morning” not “good morning”…. if it were a good morning I’d still be in bed.

Apparently there are two types of towels in my bathroom… one type to dry your hands with and one to touch if you want your fingers broken.

A small part of me is filled with self-loathing for how much pizza I can eat at one time… the rest of me is filled with pizza.

P Diddy or P Didn’t he?

Men don’t ignore women they just have “selective hearing”… for instance tell them how to roast a turkey and they’ll only remember “breast, thighs, moist and hot”.

Yes, that is a banana in my pocket AND yes, I am glad to see you… why must these things seemingly be mutually exclusive?

If jail isn’t supposed to be fun why do they have bunk beds?

I totally understand how batteries must feel… I’m rarely included in things either.

Seriously, soup… if I wanted to drink my lunch I’d go to a bar.

 I find it ironic that Spielberg’s movie about Abe Lincoln was shot in front of a live audience.

Most of my co-workers seem to work on the “principle of rockets”… by that I don’t mean they aim for the sky, rather they do nothing until their tail is on fire.

 Yes, dear… I’m absolutely positive arachnophobia is not the fear of people from Iraq.

Do you think surfers in India are called Hindudes?

It’s amazing that no one at this swim-up bar has had to leave to go to the restroom in the three hours I’ve been here.

Three things you can never get back… a word after it’s been said, time after it’s passed, and your pen if I really like it. 

I think IKEA would be more profitable if, like LEGO, they would show you 3 or 4 other things you could make from the same materials if you didn’t like what you bought.

Today’s episode of Wheel of Fortune has been cancelled……because Jesus took the wheel.





I’m just waiting for a dirtball to pick the wrong house to burglarize and we get to hear about instant justice being legally applied. That will cut down on the break-ins.



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November 1st 2014
“Dream Team” or Nightmare Read this before you decide

Posted under That's Life Columns

By Ted Hickman, a Dixon Realtor

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Dixon has never seen an election like this where one candidate blatantly lies about his city position, makes false claims about housing and is supported by the majority of the present council and developers. Current appointed city treasurer, Scott Pederson (who has taken a lot of money from those interested in just building more houses) mailed out an expensive four color flyer saying among other things, that he is the “Current Elected City Treasurer” (Dixon City Hall says this isn’t so).  He is backed by Richland Land Development Company and the California Association of Realtors plus all of the unions. He then said in an interview with the Vacaville Reporter: “Dixon hasn’t built a home since 2006…and because of that we have no revenue to move Dixon forward.” Seriously, this is what he said while touting his “fiscal skills”.

Scott apparently doesn’t know that the city has built a lot of low income housing, a big senior citizen complex and a whole subdivision is now going up by the high school, all since 2006… and this guy wants you to trust him and his expertise. He apparently doesn’t realize that the building of more housing to make his backers more money, only increase the strain on our community services and that the real need is for businesses which will produce more employment and sales tax revenue…Yet he wants your vote.

A Dixon real estate sale woman, Marianne MacDonald, (apparently doing anything to sell more houses) wrote a letter to the editor saying Scott could be the foundation of a “dream team” which already includes the group that brought you the $7 million dollar hole downtown, the double sewage rates (while rejecting a vote of the people) the triple water rates and the plans for another underpass…This is a dream team alright… but some dreams are nightmares and this is one.

You’ve got a documented liar backed by a big real estate sales person and association, a land developer and all of the unions who doesn’t even know housing has, and is being built. He is billing himself as the current ELECTED city treasurer when in fact he was appointed by the very same city council that is backing him for an open seat. Ouch!

The public has a simple choice on Tuesday. They can elect this guy to this current “dream team” and we can have at least two more years of what we’ve had for the last four. Or voters can reject this guy and the two incumbents and breathe some fresh air into an otherwise stale and high questionable city government which voters mistakenly put in place the last election.


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October 31st 2014
Government By Bad Old Batchelor

Posted under Mike Ceremello's Viewpoint

This next Tuesday the citizens of Dixon need to make a decision.  Do you send a message to Jack Batchelor that we have had enough of his strong mayor tactics, strong arm tactics, and silencing of our citizens or do we allow him and his Rot-Ary friends to stuff yet one more of his rotten bunch into office solidifying his hold on the council?


If you don’t believe me, I have another example for you.  Jack Batchelor and Herb Cross were overheard talking about Cross’ concerns about signature gathering for the initiative to roll back sewer rates.  Jack’s reply to Herb was “these dummies don’t realize once Lindley (the city manager) signs off on the contract it is a done deal”.


I have been telling you over and over that this sham of a smiling, back stabbing, proponent of “civility” thinks we are beneath him.  Now he has called any and all of us who oppose his hair brained, inane solutions “dummies”.  I would suggest to you that if you vote for Scat Pederson, you have proven his point in spades.  Dane Besneatte, their other half heartedly endorsed candidate, is not much better as he refuses to recognize the facts when they contradict his position.


After Jack told Herb how stupid we all are, they both got a big laugh out of it.  Evidently it truly irritated the person who overheard it because that person expressed this to my source.  You just never know who is listening, Jack and Herb.  How you ever got to where you are in life demonstrates you don’t have to be smart or good at what you do.

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So this is how government is supposed to be run?  Laugh at your constituents and do what you want.  Scat Pederson believes it.  He has told people his idea of local government is to run city business quietly behind the scenes.  The citizens’ business is public business and needs to be conducted in public, Scat.  Are you arguments as weak as the mayor’s?  Is this why you don’t want your constituents to see what you are doing … to them rather than for them?


Yes, this is the perfect addition to the nightmare dream team of Mary Ann MacDonald as stated in her letter of support for Pederson published in all of the local papers.  I would have expected nothing less from MacDonald who makes her fortune off of the actions of local officials.


MacDonald was to be the agent involved in the land purchase for the movie studio project.  She would have made well over a million dollars and this is why Batchelor fought so hard to keep the initially suggested location in the North East rather than moving it to the South West.  Money is power and the ability to put someone in the position to make money is just as powerful as having it yourself.


I can support MacDonald when she is bringing business into town but I can’t support her half baked plans to ruin our quality of life with those who should be behind bars rather than playing warden.  These same “bums” gave you Steve “Dodo” Bird and Jerry “I don’t have a brain” Castañon.  They gave you Rick Fooler before that.  They endorsed Mary Ann Cowbell for two terms of idiocy as mayor.  And they tried to give you “Fluffy” Cayler.


My question for you at this point is have you liked what this council of non-thinkers has done for you during the last two years?  These despicable churls can do nothing but agree with the recommendations of staff.


Getting back to Mr. Pederson, it seems that Scat is also a liar.  His latest mailer claims he is the “elected” city treasurer.  Did you forget that you were “appointed” two years ago?  Yeah, it doesn’t get any better than this and won’t as long as those who love Batchelor continue to pile their hatred onto the rest of us.  How can you vote for a guy who has no problem misinterpreting even minor facts?


For a college educated man, Scat Pederson knows less about what is going on in this city and how its revenues are derived than informed citizens who know the correct questions to ask.  Someone needs to tell Scat that residences demand more in services than what they generate in income to the city’s coffers through real estate taxes.  Business does the opposite.  As our city remains solidly “anti-business”, it remains to be seen how much longer Dixon will remain financially solvent.  I have to wonder how the businesses he is supposedly involved in as a “controller” have been able to survive his financial ignorance.

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As for Dane, I have to wonder why he didn’t go ballistic when the Repeater stated he was “seeking his third term”.  Dane was elected to finish less than two years of Mike Gomez’s term.  Dane followed this up with a victory for a four year term with the endorsement of this paper and its writers.


The choice was something less than great because the other candidates were a guy named Phil, a stooge put up by former councilman and IBEW thug Mike Smith, and the other Batchelor appointee Kay “Fluffy”.  So we got Dane and Thom Bogue which worked out well for me as occasionally both were lucid and intelligent rather than the rubber stampers we would have had.


I think what irks me the most about Dane is he truly believes the garbage he spews about “open government” and “transparency” when he opposes anything which truly exposes the behind the scenes criminality occurring at city hall.  Destroying public documents is a felony.


While these are real life recent examples of why certain people shouldn’t be in office, let’s look at the incompetence, lies, and deceit of our last council meeting on Tuesday of this week.  It started with Jackie Boy’s obvious distaste of being called on the carpet for continuing our city’s tarnished business attitude.  I asked a simple question.  Do you know what a “fortified wine” is?


Most people would have just calmly said “no, I don’t”.  Jack, on the other hand, took it as a personal insult that I would even ask that question.  The reason I asked it was because there was a restriction on the sale of fortified wines included as a condition of approval for the newly opened Michael’s Market.  What I didn’t realize was the animosity the mayor holds for this fledgling business.


The basic point is restricting a liquor store from selling sherry, port, marsala, madeira, commandaria, mistelle, and vermouth while other liquor stores in Dixon have no such restrictions is an unequal application of the law.  The State of Washington sought a ban on “low end” fortified wines and beers such as Thunderbird, Mad Dog 20/20 in 2005 by city council ordinance which was approved in 2006.  Cooking wines or dessert wines on the high end scale of cost and quality should not be lumped in with these others.  But where is our ordinance to equally address these problematic beverages?


The other item on the council agenda easily classified as business unfriendly was generated at the insistence of Jerry Castañon, Sr.  I would hate to be his Junior considering his lack of logic and argumentative abilities.  Jerry wants to ban those vertical banner signs known as “feather” banners.  With no documentation or proof, Jerry wants us to believe that new business is driven away because of these advertising mechanisms.  When challenged, all Jerry can be guaranteed to blurt out is “I disagree with the speaker”.  No kidding?  Not much of a convincing argument there, Jerr.


Batchelor, not to be upstaged or out done, claimed that having three banners stating “OPEN” while having another illuminated sign saying the same thing was unnecessary and unacceptable.  So whose business is doing this?  Michael’s Market of course.


So the ultimate wisdom of this council is that the city should decide how a business can or can’t advertise, what it should look like, what color paint can be applied, and what hours they should be open.  Even the Dodo bird proved he was smarter than a Neanderthal by refusing to endorse these restrictions.  The council’s solution was to form a committee to “study” this and come back with recommendations.


Another item of interest to me was the $82,000 waste of money on a consultant to develop a chromium 6 management plan.  Cal Water has been independently working on treatment processes to address the unreasonable demands of the State.  A lawsuit against the Department of Public Health was initiated some months ago but only a water purveyor may sue for an immediate injunction against the enforcement of this requirement.


After coming out of closed session, it was announced by the city attorney that legal options would be monitored and reviewed in a continuing manner.  Yet the council wanted to move ahead with the study anyway.  The mayor in his know it all fashion claimed that Cal Water would not share the knowledge they had acquired because their research cost them money to do and because they are a private company unlike the city’s run water district.  This was a lie.


Jack Caldwell, Cal Water’s manager, came down to the meeting from viewing the meeting at home to state emphatically that he had given all of the documentation to the city.  The city engineer, Joe Leach, was overheard telling Caldwell “that’s just not true”.  Too bad Leach couldn’t speak up on his own.  But that is the power that Batchelor wields.  No lie is too big or too broad not to be allowed to pass.  What a pity.

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Then we have the infamous Darth Bogue and his apples to oranges comparison.  Even though I spoke to him about this afterwards, he fails to get the obvious.  Just as he argued for complying with the State’s demands about the sewer treatment plant, he brought up that stale argument that he fears the city will be fined $10,000 per day if we don’t jump through each and every hoop any State agency gives us.


So what you are telling us, Thom, is that you will never fight against any unreasonable demand no matter how egregious it is simply because those unelected bureaucrats have the ability to fine you.  Why the hell did I ever think you had a backbone, you slithering snake?  You have truly changed for the worst in your four years in office.


If you had real government “of the people, by the people, and for the people”, none of this would be happening.  The solutions are easy and are also real.  Quit trying to control every aspect of life as it exists.  Don’t create laws telling businesses what they can’t do and find out what businesses need to succeed.  By the way, the owners of Michael’s told me that those banner signs were going to be coming down of their own volition shortly to make way for holiday decorations.  WE DON’T NEED GOVERNMENT MAKING DECISIONS BUSINESSES ARE CAPABLE OF MAKING FOR THEMSELVES.


If I were you and voting in this election, there are only two candidates who won’t go along with the mayor’s program.  Ted Hickman is one of them.  You get to figure out who the other one is.


We can either continue down the path Jack Batchelor is leading us or we can say no.  The choice is yours on November 4th.


* * * * *

For the 3rd time in five years, the San Franscisco Giants have won the world series.  Congratulations to them, their fans, and their families.  The Giants are demonstrating an alternative method of success, having created a “team” of both management and home grown minor league talent.  This is baseball at its finest …

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October 26th 2014
That’s Life©1966 #538 (10-24-14)*

Posted under That's Life Columns

Feel Free to


You as tired as we are hearing about all of the political crap? Icky Ose-Yogi Bera, what a waste of money… much better spent on really helping Stockton out. Just remember: “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me.” The only problem is many voters don’t know what they don’t know!

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The Cooley family of Dixon has done it again and put Dixon in the Gunnies Book of World Records by enlarging their famous Cool Patch corn maze to 60 acers (beating their own record)… now people are getting lost and it can take up to a couple of hours to find their way out. Not to be outdone our sons opened a specialized maze and have asked to be in the book for the world’s smallest not as Cool-Little Patch. I was told so far they’ve had two interested callers but they apparently got lost on the way because they thought GPS meant Go Past Site.


On The Home front

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The rumor mill is I don’t want to win the election. The truth is, of course, I do want to win or I wouldn’t be running.

I want to stop the insanity of a small but powerful group of foolers who so far have conned the public into believing the $7 million dollar hole downtown, the doubling of sewage rates, the tripling of water rates and not letting the citizens vote on a huge $30 million dollar issue are good things. They have called for an unsuccessful boycott of this newspaper and discouraged advertisers to no avail.

What I’ve said is that I can’t see how I can beat the money and self-proclaimed power structure. They have been begging for money and taking bribes/endorsements from the very people and groups we may have to oppose in the future. Last election I ran against about $60,000 they spent to keep me out of office. I only lost by a couple of hundred votes. This time much of the public is angry and many now see through their smoke screen that they are “doing this for your own good”.


Remember their elected current city council wouldn’t let the public vote on the huge sewage issue because they didn’t think the public was smart enough to make the decision they wanted made… More than 1,500 voters who signed petitions felt that sting… The self-proclaimed “power structure” of Dixon who got the current batch officials elected are saying I don’t want to get elected. As usual they put their spin on issue to try and convince voters to put yet a fourth member of theirs on the city council joining the three remaining members not up for election…Pederson has their backing. He’s their new guy and has more money than he needs and all of the right endorsements and thousands of big money bribes already in the bank. I’ve taken none…not a penny. Only two of the six candidates are self funded; Ceremello is the other one.

On the home front with the election only days away the worms are squirming. The two local yokels, Bogue and Bassinette, trying to keep their city council seats, are helpless to come up with a defense for the many anti-voter-taxpayer votes they’ve made in the last four years. They voted for the ever unpopular $7 million dollar hole to nowhere down town, the double sewage rate increase, the triple water rate increase. They are now saying they voted for the public’s right to vote on the $30 million sewage issue. B.S. They did a 12th hour vote for it when they knew the council had the three votes necessary to get it through…thinking about this election no doubt. Where were they all of the rest of the time when they could have stood up for the public’s right to vote on it… they apparently weren’t opposed to it then, look at the record.

The city treasurer Pederson, initially appointed by the city council, who was at each meeting, and is the council majority’s heir apparent to an open council seat, said nothing through any of this. He just sat like a lump and let this stuff happen. He now wants to be able to vote with his friends and backers (including the mayor) to add to our woes. Look at the list of his backers and the thousands of dollars in contributions/ bribes/endorsements he’s taken: Richland Land Developer, SEIU, all three city unions, CAR, the garbage guys, and a collection of those who brought you the current council majority that has stuck it to us with all of the stuff mentioned above… You want more of that…Vote for Pederson and return the two incumbents… so they can make their campaign promises good and pay back their financial supporters.

I’ve said I would give this space to any of them who can prove anything I’ve said here was in error. The following is what I’ve received from all of the other five candidates…

(             Nada, zilch, nothing, zip, etc….           ).




Remember The Six Things Last Week…

            Remember the many events that I said were taking place last Saturday in and around Dixon…Of the eight or so we made it to six as seen in the photos below. #1 SRCD plant sale That’s Kathrine  Holmes from the SRCD (Linda) and Marc Monachello from the DUSD buying plants), #2 Senior Resource Fair, #3 Dixon Soccer (some difference in size in the under 10 girls huh?) #4 Yolo’s black powder shoot at Yolo Sportsman’s Club, #5 The Silveyville Pumpkin Patch (Ellie Cisneros, supervisor) # 6 and the day ended at the Lions Club fund raiser poker night. All really cool things BTW

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More Things For Thought

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 John from Dixon was in an elevator when this really buxom young lady got in.  He was staring at her chest when she said “Will you press 1, please?”, so He did… He doesn’t remember much after that.


Did you hear about the tragedy that occurred in our local DU school district?  A whole busload of kids was diverted from their usual route and whisked off to a mime academy… never to be heard from again.


A local teenager stole his mother’s credit card and used it to pay for his girlfriend’s breast enlargement surgery… police say it’s lucky they caught him when they did or it could have resulted in an even bigger bust.


A catholic nun was arrested for embezzling nearly $200,000 from the diocese to fund her gambling addiction.  Apparently craps was her game… did that make her a holy roller?


Strip poker… the only game where the more you lose the more you have to show for it.


Growing up with an older brother who had a pet rabbit is the primary reason I don’t eat oatmeal raisin cookies. 


My wife wants her dermatologist to do a micro-abrasion on her face.  Fine with me… heck, it’s no skin off my nose.


“The trouble with quotes on the internet is it’s so damn tuff to tell if they are genuine”… Abraham Lincoln.


The weatherman predicted showers this morning and for once he was right.  I know… I took one.


Were you aware that all congressmen are buried from 12 to 15 feet deep?… it’s ‘cuz deep down their really nice people.


The only member of my family that has a personal trainer is the damn dog.


May have finally found a diet plan that actually works… the cost of food.


It’s never polite in a restaurant to ask the guy at the next table “are you done with that?”… and especially if he’s breaking up with his girlfriend.


Today I learned that the average man has 15 sex partners, the average woman has seven, and a penguin has only one… I also learned I’m a penguin.


Wouldn’t it be good to know at what point in the night as we sleep does our breath go from minty-fresh to absolutely disgusting?


How much “no more tears” shampoo do I have to pour down this babies throat to get it too stop crying?


This girl sent me a text, “your adorable”… I returned it immediately “no, you’re adorable.”… now she has a major crush on me and I was just pointing out her typo!  


Is there anybody reading this that only has one leg?… I’ve got a whole bunch of socks you can have.


My favorite part of going to church is when they pass around the tray of free money.


Have you ever wondered why in every picture of a zombie their covered with lacerations that have been sutured?… who’s giving them medical attention?


Note to all of you who received a book from me as a Christmas present… they’re due back at the library today.


I am just so tired of racial stereotypes.  Not every Middle Eastern person makes bombs… some make slurpees.


The wife’s really pissed.  Apparently the cleaning lady stole two of our best towels… the ones from the Hilton Hawaiian Inn.


Did anyone else see the Dallas cowboy’s game this week?  Tony Romo went to throw his helmet on the ground in frustration… and it was intercepted. 


Taking a shower with your clothes on shows your crazy.  Taking a shower with your clothes off shows your nuts.


Getting an excellent performance review at work and then no raise in pay is just like being told you’re getting dessert… and then learning the dessert is celery.


My new year’s resolution is to stop leaving things that need to be done so late.


It takes a smoke detector four months to stop beeping… if you happened to be wondering how lazy I am.  


Have you ever written down all the different “measures” of time?… second, minute, hour, day, week, month, year, decade, century, millennium and ‘wife shopping for clothes’.


Went to the car wash today and the attendant looked at like I was nuts… all I asked for was one of those Brazilian wax jobs every seems to be getting.


Neighborhood kid just got his brown belt in Tae Kwan Do… if you threaten him he bows very respectfully before he runs. Smart kid.

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October 17th 2014
That’s Life©1966 #537 (10-17-14)*

Posted under That's Life Columns

Feel Free to

Four guys carjack a woman a couple of blocks from us. I can’t wait until one of these brave fellows pick’s a veteran,biker or hunter’s house and they get immediate justice. Get your women pepper spray and lock & load.



Nothing To Do Around Here?

            First of all I guess I need to remind folks there are 365 days in a year. You know that right? How about sharing that information with the Dixon Chamber of commerce, they should be (once again) the clearing center for all events that are commerce orientated and try to help avoid duplicate events on the same day.



  Senior Resource Fair 2013



The following will be taking place pretty much all at the same time tomorrow: Dixon RCD annual plant sale from 8 to 12 at 6390 Lewis Rd. in Vacaville, Dixon Youth Soccer much of the day, Dixon Senior Resource Center annual do (at senior center), Yolo Black Powder Shooters tourney Saturday and Sunday  (at Yolo Sportsman  range), Dixon Lions Club poker tourney, fire department fund raiser dinner (at fire department I guess), and the big home and garden show at Jelly Belly from 10am to 6pm., today through Sunday…all tomorrow, Saturday, October 18, plus a couple of private events at the fairgrounds and the Silveyville Pumpkin Patch and the Cool Patch all in full operation…whew!  Most all of these things are open to the general public so pick out a couple and go.

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Rick Bello of Dixon shooting black powder rifle

I know the Dixon Lions Club has some tickets left for its annual fund raising Texas-Hold-em tournament help at the old Vet’s Hall downtown. A few tickets will also be available at the door for those who’ve waited. Food and drink at 6 pm (tri-tip sandwich included with your $75 buy in) with dealing to begin at 7. If you’ve never played you should, it’s for a good cause where all the money earned stays in the community.


 Lions card game 2013


How Do I Vote?


 As I usually do I’m getting calls from folks wanting to know how to vote… really. All I can do is tell them how I’m going to vote and try to simply explain the complex ballot issues.First of all, on the local level, the picture above needs an explanation… “and I approve of this message”. After seeing this photo the higher ups in the Democratic Party issued a statement saying, “If you like President Obama vote for Ted for city council.” Interestingly enough the higher ups in the Republican party, not to be out done, issued a statement saying, “If you don’t like President Obama vote for Ted for the city council.” Can you believe that!


 The State Ballot


Now for the California ballot. First of all I don’t know who in the hell any of the judges are, and they keep info about them scarce, so I’m voting NO on all of themLike it will make a difference. I’m also voting NO on just about all of the incumbents… they had their chance and they blew it as far as I am concerned. Just vote for whoever is new for both state and federal taxpayer troughs.

Props 1 & 2probably both deserve a yes vote since the “twin tunnels” was taken out and these measures should have been taken care of before the drought… So YES on them both.

Prop 45… setting all of the crap aside 45 could use a yes vote ignoring the insurance companies millions spent against it. Vote YES

Prop 46 is a complex three layered beast that will do good things but could cost us a lot, like a five to 25 percent increase in our insurance rates… so if you want what it gives and are willing to pay vote YES, otherwise NO. (I’m going with no).

Prop 47 is a no brainer and long overdue making less serious offenses non prison terms (under the right circumstances) freeing up prison space for the more violent, etc. Vote YES

Prop 48… we have enough Indian gambling that isn’t really helping the tribes like they said it would vote NO

In the local election just don’t vote for either of the incumbents or the appointed city treasurer who is the mayor’s choice to give his three man majority a fourth vote… Unless of course you like the $7 million dollar hole, the double sewage rate, triple water rates and want more low income housing and more gifts for developers… If that’s what you want vote for the people with the most signs and don’t worry about who really owns that candidate.


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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… every elected body from here to the white House needs a Mike Ceremello to keep things on the up and up. Mike is our local political bulldog, or pit-bull if you prefer, who will fight to the end for what he believes is right. I’m voting for him.  I’m sure he has the backing of the taxpayers association and the 1,500 or so people that signed the “Let us Vote” campaign. Remember that (see photo above)? They petitioned the city for the right to vote and your present city council spit in their faces essentially telling they weren’t smart enough to vote on the sewage issue…I wonder how smart these “dummies” will be at the polls? Will they vote for the council’s/mayor’s choice of Pederson or either of the two incumbents… should be interesting.



You All Remember Dane “Sleept Besneatte the attorney who as vice mayor of Dixon used his city (voter given) title to try and get an accused child molester a break in a Yolo County court room. He and the other incumbent Bogue voted for the $7 million dollar stupid hole downtown, to triple water rates and double sewage rates and until it was too late to matter, supported the council’s refusal to let the public vote on the $30 million sewage solution… this is who wants you to elect them for another four years…Think about it. Their supporters get upset about this kind of coverage but facts are facts. The incumbents have a reserved space in this column to correct anything that isn’t true…


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The president and vice president of the elect Hickman campaign.



More Things For Thought

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Are you surprised at life in general or is it just the way you plucked your eyebrows?

You call him a drug dealer… he refers to himself as “An astute, urban entrepreneur embracing the ever-booming chemical escapism market”.

I see you have some graph paper… you must be plotting something.

If we could devise a method to trap the energy men expend chewing, scratching and BS’n… there would be no need for foreign oil.

Heaven is arriving at Disneyland with your grandchildren for a great day… hell is still being there 11 hours later.

Your honor, as a casual observer I’d like to speak in the young ladies defense… in my opinion it was pretty decent exposure.

A friend that steals your tortilla chips is nacho friend.

 The good news is my proctologist called and all the tests were negative… the bad news is his ring is missing.

Nothing is worse than having jock itch… especially if you’re within 100 feet of a school or playground.

When the wife got her tongue pierced I asked her why?… she said to “enhanthe the thektual thimulation”.

Did you know that if you put dry tea bags in your shoes they absorb the nasty odor?  Your shoes smell great… but the tea tastes so bad it’s hardly worth the effort.

I purchased a semi-auto 9mm pistol but it only holds nine rounds… so when I finally go over the edge I only get to kill nine people or one cat.

How many instruments do you have to fail at before you start playing the triangle?

My kids asked if they were adopted… not yet, but we are hopeful.

Seven years bad luck for breaking a mirror is no big thing… break a condom and 18 years are shot to hell.

My moral compass must be solar powered… because it definitely quits after dark.

A man with a protruding gut was standing outside a Dixon elementary school and a faculty member approached and asked “are you expecting a child”…he responded “no, that’s from all the beer.”

Joined our neighborhood watch organization but there’s about 30 of us so I only get to wear it maybe one day a month.

My best friend told me his wife talks a lot in her sleep… “I know” was probably not the best answer.

With God all things are possible… but with money all things are probable and with a good accountant most are deductible.

 It may have looked like I was doing crunches… actually I was just trying to get up.

Arguing with a woman is like being attacked by a bear… you’re better off just playing dead and hoping they get bored and walk away.

I feel like trying new things in bed… for instance getting out of it.

If Forrest Gump ever got a personal computer what do you think his password would be?… 1forrest1

I find I’m never too old to just throw random crap in other peoples shopping carts when they look away.

Just replaced the damn cat’s litter with 44 packages of pop rocks… and now we wait.

Every grocery store has free samples… if you’re quick enough.

I bought a toilet brush at Wal-Mart the other day but it’s really abrasive… think I’ll go back to paper.

Evidently trying to schedule the parent-teacher conference over drinks and remarking “let’s just see what happens” is considered inappropriate.





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October 17th 2014
The Ability To Think

Posted under That's Life Columns



Today we get to consider the wisdom of Alexis de Tocqueville, a French nobleman who traveled to America for two years in 1831 to ostensibly observe penitentiaries in America.  As de Tocqueville is a rather lengthy name, he shall be referenced in the rest of this brief treatise as Alex.  What came out of Alex’s travels was De la démocratie en Amérique or more familiarly Democracy in America.

The specific and temporally pertinent discourse applies to where we find America and Dixon today.  It is hard to believe that Alex wasn’t taking lessons from Nostradamus, another Frenchman who was born 300 years earlier in 1503.  His comments were interesting from the perspective of being unapologetic in pointing out the propensity of the populace to be turned into farm animals.  But more on that later.

In Volume II, Book 4, Chapter 6 of Democracy in America, Alex writes about soft despotism:

Thus, After having thus successively taken each member of the community in its powerful grasp and fashioned him at will, the supreme power then extends its arm over the whole community. It covers the surface of society with a network of small complicated rules, minute and uniform, through which the most original minds and the most energetic characters cannot penetrate, to rise above the crowd. The will of man is not shattered, but softened, bent, and guided; men are seldom forced by it to act, but they are constantly restrained from acting. Such a power does not destroy, but it prevents existence; it does not tyrannize, but it compresses, enervates, extinguishes, and stupefies a people, till each nation is reduced to nothing better than a flock of timid and industrious animals, of which the government is the shepherd.

 I have always thought that servitude of the regular, quiet, and gentle kind which I have just described might be combined more easily than is commonly believed with some of the outward forms of freedom, and that it might even establish itself under the wing of the sovereignty of the people.

 Our contemporaries are constantly excited by two conflicting passions: they want to be led, and they wish to remain free. As they cannot destroy either the one or the other of these contrary propensities, they strive to satisfy them both at once. They devise a sole, tutelary, and all-powerful form of government, but elected by the people. They combine the principle of centralization and that of popular sovereignty; this gives them a respite: they console themselves for being in tutelage by the reflection that they have chosen their own guardians. Every man allows himself to be put in leading-strings, because he sees that it is not a person or a class of persons, but the people at large who hold the end of his chain.

By this system the people shake off their state of dependence just long enough to select their master and then relapse into it again. A great many persons at the present day are quite contented with this sort of compromise between administrative despotism and the sovereignty of the people; and they think they have done enough for the protection of individual freedom when they have surrendered it to the power of the nation at large. This does not satisfy me: the nature of him I am to obey signifies less to me than the fact of extorted obedience. I do not deny, however, that a constitution of this kind appears to me to be infinitely preferable to one which, after having concentrated all the powers of government, should vest them in the hands of an irresponsible person or body of persons. Of all the forms that democratic despotism could assume, the latter would assuredly be the worst.

 When the sovereign is elective, or narrowly watched by a legislature which is really elective and independent, the oppression that he exercises over individuals is sometimes greater, but it is always less degrading; because every man, when he is oppressed and disarmed, may still imagine that, while he yields obedience, it is to himself he yields it, and that it is to one of his own inclinations that all the rest give way. In like manner, I can understand that when the sovereign represents the nation and is dependent upon the people, the rights and the power of which every citizen is deprived serve not only the head of the state, but the state itself; and that private persons derive some return from the sacrifice of their independence which they have made to the public.

To translate, people want to be free but also to be led.  Thinking, as well as making decisions for yourself, is work best left to others because you don’t have the time or inclination, preferring instead to take the kids to soccer practice or drink beer while watching the tube.  You have no problem becoming “a flock of timid and industrious animals”, a.k.a sheep, “of which the government is the shepherd”.  Although Alex didn’t directly call you “sheep”, the term shepherd eliminates other possibilities.

There is far more to analyzing Alex’s observations than I can afford to spend time on here.  More broadly, the “network of small complicated rules” is what we see on the local level.  You can’t do this and you can’t do that, unless you are one of the bad old boys who essentially are the current aristocracy, deserved or not.

It is quite difficult for me to convey these concepts to you at not only an intellectual level you will understand but because you are inured into this system which robs you of your freedoms slowly but surely over time.  You only think you have freedom.

You have been convinced to recycle.  You have been convinced there is global warming despite any and all proofs to the contrary.  You go along with Jack Batchelor and his $28.5 million activated sludge process because he is your leader which you refuse to question.

You might be interested to know that “activated sludge” was developed in the 1950’s.  Rather than progress into the twenty first century and use something like “ferrate treatment”, Jack and the State Water Board would prefer you continue to drive 58 Chevy’s (maybe that is a bad example) rather than a brand new Corvette with 650 horse power.  On second thought, Jack and most other liberals would prefer you go back to the horse and buggy as his second best option to you just leaving the planet.

The bottom line to de Tocqueville’s observations is this is all about freedom and being fooled.  What Alex fails to recognize is the spirit of the American people as well as our ability to wake up every so often.  Perhaps those on government handouts, there’s not anything exactly “industrious” in this situation, are incapable of recognizing their situation but even they have their own form of freedom unassailable by bureaucracy because they disobey the rules and there aren’t enough enforcers to do anything about it.  Being satisfied with your freedoms may consist of your six pack and big screen tv.

Is that all you really want out of life?  I know most just want to be left alone.  Rulers find that an impossibility.  I find it to be an expected fault on their part.  Some who would rule are only focused on forcing others to obey.  This comes from not recognizing or realizing that positions in our government, as well as our city staff, are there to “serve the people” rather than lord over the populace.

You have an election this November.  Don’t you think it would be a good idea to elect people who understand these concepts?  I am tiring of fighting for you when you won’t fight for yourselves.  It is amazing that so few are willing to see …



* * * * *

I would like to thank Deborah Cumins for her letter to the editor in last week’s paper.  Her logic demonstrates quite well the foregoing section of this column.  It also shows exactly why I write the way I write.

For those of you who missed it, Deborah stated she agrees with what I say but not how I say it and therefore won’t vote for me.  To quote Shakespeare from Romeo and Juliet in Act 2 and Scene 2, “What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet;”.  Referencing the detestable positions of Scatt Pederson by another name would only serve to lessen their impact on the dulled senses of Dixon’s population.  Do you truly feel electing this individual or any other “nice” happy horse is going to create true and needed change within our government?


Let’s look at her other examples as well as conclusions. “Maybe Steve isn’t all that sharp”.  Maybe Ms. Cumins never got to see Alexander in action.  When there are no repercussions to your actions, those actions persist.  Some would call what I do “bullying”.  As untenable as the term “spanking” is to this generation of liberal loons, and we have seen what the lack of corporal punishment has wrought, publically spanking incompetence and blatant stupidity becomes necessary lest it continue.

One more quote Deborah didn’t like, “For those of you who still can think even though you reside in Dixon …”, is appropriate as many of us have been lulled into political apathy.  Why would anyone think that “civility” or “reaching across the aisle” is a solution when it has given us the system we now endure?

As for sarcasm not being professional, I direct your attention to Mark Levin, Rush Limbaugh, Michael Savage, Sean Hannity or to those on the left who labeled Sarah Palin as “a pig with lipstick”.  The gentlemen named make far more money than you or I and are quite professional as well as sarcastic.  At least I didn’t liken Dixon to Limbaugh’s Rio Linda.

I would suggest to Ms. Cumins that she has a deeper psychological problem coupled with her acceptance of the position foisted on her by government and society.  Many of us have this same problem.  You simply don’t like strength when you see it or know how to handle it.

I would prefer your vote but perhaps you prefer lukewarm tea …

* * * * *

To wrap this up, there are a two items which have come to my attention.  At this year’s Grillin’ and Chillin’, an armed forces veteran witnessed Devon Minnema’s disrespectful treatment of the American flag.  I have been told by eye witnesses that after Devon took the flag down and dropped it on the ground, that rather than folding it he balled it up and stuffed it into a box.  The vet was so hot he got in his vehicle and left rather than confronting Minnema.


If Devon is this disrespectful of our Nation’s flag, why would any of us want to install him into a leadership position?  How does a kid who has attended national conservative caucuses betray his supposed and preached principles?  Was this a sign of immaturity or something far deeper?

Is this excusable as an unthinking action of youth?  Was it no big deal?  Yet what is no big deal to some is a mighty big deal to others.  If you are going to represent Dixon, Devon, you need to understand you represent us all.  Some would say I am calling the kettle black, but criticizing ignorance in no uncertain terms is quite different than burning a cross in someone’s yard.

The second item is the incorrect assertion that Thom Bogue flip-flopped on Planned Development Areas, or PDA’s, as stated by both Mary Savage and Shirley Humphrey.  Bogue was the only person who voted no both times.  The problem came because Bogue revived a dead subject and allowed time for Jack Batchelor to persuade Steve Bird and Jerry Castañon to change their initial positions after they had been scared by the raucous public turnout of the first meeting.  The real “flip flops” were Bird and Castañon in this case.

 If I were to list all of the other instances where Bogue actually flipped, I would need another page.  We could start with Measure N, the Sunshine ordinance …


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October 11th 2014
That’s Life©1966 #536 (10-10-14)*

Posted under That's Life Columns

Thank you’s are in order. I want to thank Steve Alexander, the Vacaville Reporter, the Solano County Board of Realtors, and all of the various unions, etc. for NOT ENDORSING me…This tells the public exactly what I want them to know!(See bribes below).


The Vote By Mail Ballots Are Out


I only have a couple of dozen signs so if you’d like one please email or call me especially if you live on a corner or busy street…I’m getting signed slugged to death by all of the other candidates with deep pockets… even though mostly they are someone else’s pockets.

So far appointed city treasurer, the heir apparent pick by the reigning majority, Pederson leads the bribe race (surprise!) reported having a war chest of $8,614 followed by Minnema (kid learns quick huh?) with $3,589, followed by Bogue with$2,400 and Besneatte with $1,690 (reported). The other two candidates, Ceremello and I reported no bribes accepted.

Signs really don’t matter votes do… As of Wednesday we started receiving the vote by mail ballots in Dixon. You can fill them out and mail them now if you wish, take them to city hall or wait until Election Day and drop them off at your precinct. No matter what you choose to do just make sure to check the first name on the ballot for Dixon… Just happens to be me. If you don’t have anyone else to vote for you can vote for only one.



No Wimps Here!

2014 wATER Polo

If you want to talk about tough you need to attend the last Dixon High School water polo game against Fairfield on Wednesday October 22. You can see both girl’s and boys’ varsity teams in action at the Hall Park pool starting at 4 p.m. Above you can see #22 Claire Mitchel (lower right) score a goal at Tuesday’s match. Who knew? This isn’t a sport for pansies.

2014 Dollar Bill

During the eight hours we spent volunteering in the ticket booth at Lambtown last weekend we received a dollar with “wheresgeorge” stamped on it. I tracked it back on the computer web site and found out it started being tracked July 23 in Ripon, 27 days and three hours and 98 miles later it showed up in Santa Rosa. And then 49 days and 21 hours and 47 miles later it made its way to Lambtown in Dixon. Kind of a neat site to play with if you have time. Just go there and enter a bill’s info and then track where it goes and see how long it took to get there…we’re passing it on.



Not So Neat Lambtown Treat…Eat A Puppy…?

azzzzzthe loook


The sign, when they let me read it said, “Would you eat a baby puppy…” Two misguided young girls from some Vegan group spent a few hours trying to get the attention of Lambtown goers. About 99 per cent ignored them and their hand made signs. A couple tried to tell them this was more of a “wool show” than anything else and was about collection and spinning wool into useful things. They didn’t want to listen. I finally got out of the booth and went out to see what the signs said since they had their backs to us. I had a Lambtown hat on so the one girl kept turning away and wouldn’t let me see her sign. I finally got around and saw the “Would you eat a (redundant?) baby puppy…” Now those of you that know me can pick the actual one comment you’d think I made from the ones below:

  1. Ever tried it?
  2. You know this is a semi-hippie wool show all organic and stuff don’t you?
  3. You know your partner here is carrying a leather purse don’t you?

After getting nothing but a dirty look and not being able to establish a dialogue I left with my parting shot which was:

  1. Aren’t you supposed to talk to people?
  2. You aren’t being very responsible or helping your cause by being rude.
  3. For you information… they taste just like Spotted Owl.

Several really neat things did happen. One was a lady who told us to “pass it on” as she paid for the next person who came to the window. The next seven people in a row we tried to pass it on to did the same thing…We finally told a service man’s wife she got in free and used the free pass.

The second thing was several rural people thank us for printing the piece about the dirt balls who abandoned helpless animals out in the country thinking they will somehow revert to the wild and survive. They said they see it all the time with a poor family pet curled up in a ball waiting for its “family” to come back and get them. They usually die of starvation or dehydration if the SPCA can’t get to them first. If you see someone dump and animal get the license number and call the sheriff’s department and get the idiots busted… please.


MoreThings For Thought2014 Smikley - Copy


Watch your butt while in the hospital… its enema territory.


It’s been said you can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear… but a lot of women have figured out how to get a mink coat out of an old goat.


A fashion house in New York is marketing a wedding dress that sells for $99… The perfect way to tell your boyfriend “I do, I guess”.


I found a baby snake in my backyard while mowing… I won’t have to mow for a long time since the yard is now on fire.


I don’t  know guys.  The whole “play dead when a bear attacks” thing sound suspiciously like something the bears might have come up with.


Faces you make when sitting on the toilet… ( o_o ), ( >_< ), ( o_o), ( ^_^).


Why on earth would you name your child hunter?  Hunter is a profession… that’s like naming your kid dentist.


As we grow older we become more and more like the stars… gaseous and dying.


In the beginning God made the heavens and the earth… everything else was made in China.


All I ask is that when some fool murders me you show up and insist they make the chalk outline four sizes smaller.


I saw a guy at the mall today with several lip-ring piercings… it took all my self-control not to attach a shower curtain.


Not only do pharmacists fill prescriptions but now they give immunizations and do diabetic counseling and just today the company installed a defibrillator… it’s great for making grilled cheese sandwiches.


The last time I had sex, in celebration, I fired my musket skyward… accidentally alerting the confederates to our presence.


When you have a bladder infection you know urine trouble.


Mom always told me that “happiness comes from within”… probably why it feels so good to pass gas.


The wife feels I’m quite immature yet she did say I do do a lot for the good of the family… I’m still giggling over the “do do” part.


I think it’s neat how if you add a glass of orange juice to some champagne it seems to say “I’m classy”… instead of “It’s nine in the morning and you have a drinking problem!”


Did you ever think the reason men won’t ask directions is because they don’t want to arrive at whatever foolish destination their lady picked out?


I’m slowly tending toward becoming a vegetarian so for now I’m only eating seafood… like lobster, prawns and drowned cows.


If I ever go missing it sure won’t be hiking in the mountains… so you don’t even have to look there.


Starting to get really worried about this Ebola virus I keep hearing about… I mean, I’ve got Norton, but still…


I wanted to spend some special time with my granddaughter so I took her shopping, to lunch and a movie… I asked her on the way home what her favorite part was… she said the M&M’s.


Do you ever wake up, kiss the person beside you and just be thankful for being alive?  I did… it’s not really appreciated on airline flights apparently.


True love doesn’t care about the appearance or size of your wallet; it’s all about what’s inside… your wallet.


Teachers are a lot like an alarm clock… they won’t shut up when you’re trying to sleep.


I seemingly have a really nice butt and was totally unaware of it until today… after talking to a couple of young women as I walked away I heard one of them say “what an ass!”.


Conversations between Adam and eve must have been difficult… who’d they have to gossip about?


You remind me a lot of Viagra… it seems like you exist just to make my life harder.


Amazon is selling used copies of “fifty shades of grey”… ewe!


Very few people are aware that albert Einstein had an evil brother, also a scientist, who created a monster from body parts… his name was Frank.

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October 11th 2014
Elect Ted Hickman to the Dixon City Council

Posted under That's Life Columns

Letter to the Editor, Vacville Reporter, Dixon Tribune

               Ted Hickman has been a member of the Dixon Post 208 of the American Legion for over 25 years and recently served more than four years a Vice Commander under both Robert Fletcher and Greg Coppes. He is the only candidate who has, and still will help, the veterans and active military in the community. If you are a veteran or active duty you should vote for him.

Hickman co-founded Dixon Little League and arranged for the Dixon City Council to give that group a 100 year lease for $1 a year. Both of their sons, many years later, played and he and his wife were board members. He held every board position from President to safety officer. He had the field named Larson Park while a councilmember. If you have kids who played or are playing you should vote for him.

Ted and his wife Linda were both board members of the Dixon Soccer Club and Ted served as head referee for several years. He and his wife and sons were all certified soccer coaches and referees. He is still a certified State Referee and USSF referee instructor and just completed teaching and turning out 19 new referees for DYSL. He was the driving force behind the formation of Northwest Park and the installation of the soccer fields. He had the big field named after Neil Rotteveel for bringing soccer to Dixon. If you have kids who are or have played soccer you should vote for him.

He and his family have operated the Dixon Toys for Tots/Community Christmas Programs since about 1966 and have made the holiday season much better times for thousands of families, tens of thousands of children and thousands of senior citizens in the 48 years he and his family have run this private, non-profit organization. If you have worked with this organization or been a recipient you should vote for him.

He has been a photo-journalist in Dixon since coming here from Ohio in the 60’s to take over as Editor of the Dixon Tribune. In his seven years as editor he won the only first place state and national award the paper has ever received and was nominated for the Pulitzer Prize.

He has received over 50 awards for both business and personal accomplishments and the list goes on and on. They had been involved in 4-H, FFA Dixon swim team, high school band and all of the school things in which their two sons, Trey and Joel were involved.

Not one of the other five candidates can hold a candle to this. Oh, I forgot he also has served three elected terms on the city council, that’s 12 years.

He deserves your vote. He can’t be bought or sold and is only in this election to give the people of Dixon an honest, non-controlled voice on their elected body. He’s first on the ballot please remember to check his name. You should vote for him.

Mr.and Mrs. Shane Nichols,

Dixon, Ca. 95620

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